To my fellow SO's:
After reading all the recent posts, I have had a deluge of thoughts. Please bear with me.
There are so many of us going through difficult times. From "simple" issues to the "complex," they all affect the course of our day to day lives. The challenges should not be catagorized because as we all know, every challenge can make or break our spirit. I find it difficult to deal with many times that I cannot just put on my Super Hero outfit and save the day, that just when things feel good, a tornado drops out of the sky and creates havoc in just a few seconds while lasting for days. The rise and fall of our lives in relation to our BP's episodes can be at best a pain in the back side and at worst life and soul destructive. To be or not to be--- question of the BP. To stay or not to stay--- question of the SO. Where is the line between supporter and Joan of Arc? I believe that is an individual's answer, and an answer which is neither right nor wrong but survival. Many times, espcially when there are children involved as well, going down with the ship is NOT admirable. What the SO has to decide is whether the current price being paid is worth the long term investment. It takes a lot of courage, love, and strength to stay but it takes a lot of honesty, courage, love, and strength to let go. Everyone has their own threshold and whether that is days, weeks, months, years, or decades, one is no better than the other.
But to survive, we all need our life preservers. Whether its our own groups of support, laughter, tears, hobbies, etc, whatever keeps us afloat in a positive, healthy manner is just right for each one of us. Because we are complex beings, dealing with complex and often unpredictable situations, it seems to be important that we balance the tragedy and comedy of lives. Without one or the other, we are either choked by depression ourselves or hysterically armored to the point of numbness. But many times, the outward masks and helps buffer the interior. That's where our balance becomes so important.
Funny how I am at the word "balance," which seems to be the key word for our BP's. We must not forget that we too need it. For how can we continue to help our BP's seek it if we ourselves are lacking balance? And balance can mean many things to many people, but nevertheless, whatever that means in each individuals life, it must be sought for ourselves. Continuing to chip away at what is left of ourselves surely is an injustice to our beings and our BPs.
I suppose I wanted to remind myself of these things most of all. In the midst of all the "rides," in my quest to keep the peace and take care of our world, I forget about my own world, which needs just as much tendering. Then again, I wanted to the share these thoughts as gifts to all of you, for we are bound with a common thread and perhaps then you need these words as well.
All the best,
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